Are clamshells driving you crazy? Why I hate these tricky containers
I’ve decided that clamshells are cool for clams but infuriating for the rest of us.
Have you ever tried to sneak some leftover chow mein, a grocery-store cookie or fruit-topped slice of cheesecake at 2 a.m. without waking everybody within two blocks?
All depends on how the treat is stored.
If you succeed in opening one of those clamshell-shaped containers, you’ll hear the household equivalent of the shot heard ’round the world: “SNAP!!”
Made of pressed paper, foam or clear, stiff plastic, these boxes are often used for food storage by supermarket bakeries, deli counters, restaurants and fast food joints.
Clamshell containers can make it easier to transport home anything from cut-up watermelon or a luscious looking salad.
They beat an open bowl with slippery plastic wrap, I guess.
How to open a clamshell container
When firmly snapped shut, the clamshell containers are nearly impenetrable.
You want to get into the clamshell? Silly person.
To get there, you’ll have to firmly grab an upper little tab on the lid, a tab that extends slightly out from the sealed rim. It’s supposedly there to make the container easier to open.
However, that little tab on top is far too tiny for anybody but a mischievous elf to grasp, let alone separate from its matching tab-mate on the bottom half of the container.
Even if you can get a good grip on the top tab, there are few human forces strong enough to fully separate those two halves without demolishing what’s inside the container.
Holding the container down with one foot while you pull isn’t advisable, especially if your mother-in-law’s birthday dessert is inside the box and the party’s already going in the next room.
I’ve resorted to trying to slide a knife between the top and bottom of the clamshell, and then twisting. Or using jewelers’ pliers on one or both tabs.
All I succeeded in doing was flipping the box over and barely escaping a visit to the emergency room for a badly mangled hand.
Closing box is even harder
Once you’ve clawed your way into the clamshell, you might want to reclose the box and save the rest of your snack for later.
It sounds easy, right? Just fold the lid back over the bottom and push down on those little nubs.
You line up the nub on the bottom tray with the dome on the top part, press hard enough to force your forefinger through your thumb, then let go.
Sproing! The lid springs open again, spewing salad dressing or pie filling or overripe apricot all over your clean shirt and the kitchen floor.
What about other packaging?
Clamshells aren’t the only packaging created by manufacturers to make our lives difficult.
Good luck navigating the heavy-duty plastic cases that encase everything from toys to electronics.
Should you use scissors? A box cutter? A chainsaw? A jackhammer?
Someone gave me a gadget that’s specifically designed to help you crack open those clamshell-style plastic seals, and, while clunky looking and awkward to handle, it sort of works.
Whenever I have a clamshelled product in my hand, of course, that cutter is mysteriously absent.
So my treasure remains permanently encased in plastic, safe from me and whatever I wanted to do with it.
Clams are for chowder, not shopping.
I’m a hugely frustrated consumer, not a clam. There has to be a better way.
This story was originally published October 10, 2023 at 5:00 AM.
