Editorials

Shame on scofflaws who don’t pick up after their pets

Maggie Mae fetches a ball for her owners at Olde Port Beach in Port San Luis on Jan. 13, 2017.
Maggie Mae fetches a ball for her owners at Olde Port Beach in Port San Luis on Jan. 13, 2017. jjohnston@thetribunenews.com

If dogs could talk:

Scout: Hey Rex, did you hear the Port San Luis Harbor District could ban us from its beaches?

Rex: (Unintelligible growl)

Scout: Yeah, it seems like some humans (pronounced sardonically) can’t be bothered picking up after us. They either just leave our doo-doo right there in the sand for anybody to step in, or they put it in those little green bags, but then they don’t bother to toss the bags in the trash!

Rex: (Another unintelligible growl, followed by canine cursing)

Scout: And they say we’re the slobs, right? But listen, there’s still a chance. The district hasn’t made a decision yet. So maybe if we remind humans — you know, give ’em a gentle nudge or whimper a bit — they’ll start picking up after us. And then we’ll get to keep chasing seagulls and sniffing seaweed and splashing in the waves and all that other great stuff we do at the dog beach.

Rex: I don’t know, Scout. Maybe whimpering isn’t enough.

Scout: You thinkin’ what I’m thinkin’?

Rex: Yeah, I think this calls for …

Scout and Rex, in unison: BRICKBATS!!!!

OK, so dogs can’t talk. Or type. But we can. And in the name of Rex and Scout and all the other dogs and their human companions who love spending time at one of the few local beaches where dogs can roam off leash, please, please pick up after your pets. And remember to keep a close eye on them so you can head off trouble before it starts.

Otherwise, expect a beach bag full of brickbats covered in dog drool — courtesy of Rex and Scout.

Related stories from San Luis Obispo Tribune

  Comments