'Sexiest man alive' judges must not have looked in Atascadero

While standing in line at the grocery store the other day, I learned that some male actor is the “sexiest man alive” or something like that. I’d never heard of him so it didn’t mean anything except I wondered just how do they know he’s the sexiest man alive?

Does that mean the sexiest on the entire planet? Maybe it just means here in the United States. And did they interview all the men residing within the borders of the country? I certainly don’t remember being interviewed for the title.

I struggle with such pronouncements when I see the “sexiest” man or woman being named by this or that magazine. I look up and see any number of ordinary Atascadero citizens standing in line at the checkout line who are just as physically attractive as those on those slick magazine covers. Or how about the “person of the year” selections such as Time magazine does year after year.

It is such a subjective thing. I marvel at Barbara Walters’ selections when she trots out her own list of what she considers the most significant personalities of any given year.

I wince every time I read or hear that James Dean was one of the greatest actors of all time. He was just an actor, period.

When a magazine proclaims that someone is the sexiest man alive, it should be required to list the criteria on which that decision was made. Maybe the reason I wasn’t considered was because I’m too old, outside the age group being considered. Maybe the honor only goes to someone in the entertainment field. I’d feel better knowing that.

How many people were involved in the selection? Was it the editorial board of the magazine? The publisher? The editor? A poll of readers?

My wife always says there aren’t any really good men out there so the best a woman can do is marry a competent handyman; you know, a good fixer-upper. By that, I think she means one who can fix things, not one who needs fixing.

Magazines are so fickle. It seems there is always a new sexiest man or woman out there to be singled out and displayed on the cover for everyone to ogle as the clerk rings up our vegetables.

Knowing that gives me hope of discovery.

This story was originally published December 8, 2014 at 10:38 AM with the headline "'Sexiest man alive' judges must not have looked in Atascadero."