Different strokes can lead you to go with different flow

I know many of us chuckle when we talk about our families being “crazy” and the challenges we may face when we’re all put in the same room at the same time. Our family motto is “Take a breath, lose your turn.” We’re talkers. We’re all wonderful in our own way; we love and are devoted to each other and help each other in any way we can when we can. But, boy, are we different.

Let me start by saying I am so grateful to have escaped to Cambria when I did. While I certainly know people who maintain some of those city traits, like being paranoid about every little thing that moves or breathes, I believe it begins to diminish after time in a peaceful place.

I have a family member who is widowed, friendly but only had one really close friend who recently died, is a self-proclaimed cat lady and is suddenly swept up in the social media/online dating/perpetual-photo-taking phenomenon. I don’t know how to help change things for her. Would things only be better in my head as I don’t relate to any of this and she doesn’t see any of it as a problem? Likely.

There are many articles on how to redirect teens back into the “real” world, but that is when they are living under your roof, under your guidance. This person is an adult in her own world. And she is surely not different from hundreds of thousands (if not more) adults tightly embracing technology for connection.

You can point out, suggest, lecture all you want, people are not going to give up something they perceive as comfort. This is an important point to keep in mind when in fact you are dealing with teens. What need is not getting met? How does one direct them to the healthiest way of meeting those needs?

What am I talking about? She went on two dates with two different people from her Tinder account while she was in town! But, this is just so foreign to me! Well, I did go online once, met the last man in my life and, well … guess it’s all the same when you get down to it. It’s hard to meet people, especially if you’re shy like this person.

But, technology aside, I do know people in the city who are environmentally conscious, are engaged in their communities or create their own niches and take very good care of themselves physically.

Then there are those who (gasp!) think differently than I do! They may even be aware of what’s going on in the world but don’t spend a great deal of time addressing it because it is just beyond their power, in their heads.

They still eat Campbell’s soup, every little thing from spilling a glass of water to someone not responding back to a text immediately is a world crisis worthy of many swear words and they could no more fix a squeaky door than do brain surgery. Sigh. I shouldn’t try to hide that I myself am a junk food junkie, that I quietly grouse about having to repair something every day and I’m slowly becoming a hermit to avoid the possibility of stumbling into yet another intimate relationship.

All this said, I just hope that this person’s life settles into a flow as happy as mine, that she does indeed find the “right one” for her out there in cyberspace or wherever and we can go an hour in conversation without looking at a phone or complaining about something so first-world-problem-ish as a chipped nail.

I guess we’re not “crazy,” per se — we just look at life through different colored glasses and march to different tempos.

Mine suits me fine, thank you.

This story was originally published September 14, 2016 at 8:35 AM with the headline "Different strokes can lead you to go with different flow."