Opinion - Columns - Bill Morem

Published: Thursday, Jul. 30, 2009

Bill Morem: How did Gail Wilcox and David Edge find time to run the county?

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Cue the “Father Knows Best” theme.

Enter Kitten.

“Oh, Daddy, I just don’t know what I’m going to do. I do so want to be popular, and I’ve got all of these feelings for boys, but I’ve got to put out and, oh, life can be so confusing.”

Father: “There, there, Kitten. Tell me all about it. Did the boys get to first base? Second? Be sure not to leave out any details. After all, Father DOES know best.”

And there you have it. The Wilcox case distilled to its very simplest: former County Administrative Officer David Edge acting in a father-figure capacity to his second-in-command, Gail Wilcox, as he condescendingly pats her on the head while demanding to know every salacious detail of her sex life.

And Wilcox, whether because she needed a father figure, or actually thought of Edge as one of the girls, or, more probably, was currying her boss’s favor for further promotions, is only too eager to comply with his requests — until things went south for the both of them this spring.

The Robertson Report, which delves into Wilcox’s affair with a local sheriff’s deputy, reads like hormone-driven text messages between horny seventh-graders.

The depth and breadth of the slap-and-tickle e-mails that flew around the County Government Center make one wonder a couple of things: Did these two ever have time to effectively pay attention to the workings of county government? Did they ever get their heads out of their drawers and out of “Peyton Place”?

The report fires a proverbial Scud missile into Wilcox’s sexual harassment suit against Edge and the county, that much seems sure. Rather than coming across as a victim, Wilcox’s persona is more a curious mixture of smitten teen and sexual dilettante (“Oh, why, oh, why don’t the boys like me. … Oh, daddy, conquest!”)

One thing in the report is apparent: Wilcox was tough, which, once again, pretty much takes the air out of her lawsuit tires.

And Edge? Aside from coming across as somewhat of a voyeur, it’s apparent he could pour on the charm and then just as quickly turn the tap of scorn and obnoxious condescension until his underlings were begging, “Please, headmaster, may I have another caning?”

If those characteristics didn’t get the job done, he’d pout, and resentment among the ranks would grow. As a former county employee said of Edge’s regime: “It was a poisoned corporate culture.”

So here’s the bottom line: Do we still have to abide by that old canard that we have to pay ridiculously high salaries — Edge at $273,000 a year including benefits and Wilcox at $228,000 a year including benefits — to attract the best and brightest to jobs like these?

From the way they’ve acted, horny seventh-graders would fit the bill nicely — and cost a lot less.

Bill Morem can be reached at bmorem@thetribunenews.com or 781-7852.